People over projects

Wallace Stegner describes their friendship as “a relationship that has no formal shape, there are no rules or obligations or bonds as in marriage or the family, it is held together by neither law nor property nor blood, there is no glue in it but mutual liking. It is therefore rare.”

“Holy places are dark places. It is life and strength, not knowledge and words, that we get in them. Holy wisdom is not clear and thin like water, but thick and dark like blood.” C.S. Lewis

“The Bible almost promises a loss of comfort to those who follow a kingdom path, but this is a great time to shake our heads and ask: Is that really what we wanted, anyhow? Did we want to get to the end and say, ‘Well, at least I was comfortable?’ I feel like we know enough about one another at this point to know the answer is no. At the very core of who we are, because we’re made in the image of Christ, we want what He wants. We want our lives wrung out for the glory of God. We want to make an impact. We want more people to know Him. We want to know more of Him.” Jess Connolly

“Why be saddled with this thing called life expectancy? Of what relevance to an individual is such a statistic?

Am I to concern myself with an allotment of days I never had and was never promised? Must I check off each day of my life as if I am subtracting from this imaginary hoard?

No, on the contrary, I will add each day of my life to my treasure of days lived. And with each day, my treasure will grow, not diminish.”

Robert Brault

“My wish for you is that you continue. Continue to be who and how you are, to astonish a mean world with your acts of kindness. Continue to allow humor to lighten the burden of your tender heart.” Maya Angelou

“One life on this earth is all we get, whether it is enough or not enough, and the obvious conclusion would seem to be at the very least we are fools if we do not live it as fully and bravely and beautifully as we can.” Frederick Buechner

“Those that lack friends to open themselves unto are cannibals of their own hearts. But one thing is most admirable…which is, that this communicating of a man’s self to his friend works two contrary effects; for it redoubleth joys, and cutteth griefs in halves. For there is no man that imparteth his joys to his friend, but he joyeth the more; and no man that imparteth his griefs to his friend, but he grieveth the less.” Francis Bacon

“May we learn to be less afraid of the shadows. And may we realize that just because they are a part of the picture, that doesn’t mean that’s all there is.” Harper Nichols

“Occasionally weep deeply over the life you hoped would be. Grieve the losses. Then wash your face. Trust God. And embrace the life you have.” John Piper

Isn't It Lovely?

"May I please tell you about that piece of art?" I asked a lady who was browsing the Mission Made Jewelry table.

Before she could say anything, I continued. "My friend, Vladimir, made that. Isn't it lovely?"

The lady stopped and looked at me.

"Well, thank you. I was afraid you were about to tell me about poor people. I'm not interested in a pity story. Now I'm listening. Tell me more."

Do for the next 20 minutes, we talked about the beauty of Haitian products as she browsed the table, choosing 10 different items - including this one - as Christmas gifts for family and friends.

She took Vladimir's cards, one for each gift, because she wants her friends and family to know who made their gift.

"I'm glad I stopped by," she said as she walked away.

Ma'am, I'm glad, too. Thanks for letting you tell you about all of the good things to be found in Haiti. Thanks for focusing on that part of the narrative. 🇭🇹❤️

For the first time ever

I should be at the airport this morning. I had my ticket.

For weeks, I have been asked when I would return to Haiti, and here’s how I had answered:

• When the PAP airport opens

• When I feel peace from God

• When Steeve says yes.

But it never occurred to me that I would be hearing yes and Steeve would be hearing no. We’ve always been in agreement on things.

After much prayer, I had purchased a ticket for today. It seemed to line up perfectly. American Airlines started flying yesterday. I had determined a while back I really didn’t want to be on the first flight back, but being on the 2nd flight seemed reasonable.

In fact, last week I had packed my first checked bag as it seemed more and more likely American Airlines would actually fly as scheduled, after canceling earlier re-start dates.

But then on Tuesday, in a staff meeting, I mentioned coming on Friday, and Vorb’s reaction was strong, so strong that I grabbed a pen and wrote down what he said:

“I don't like the atmosphere of the country. Because of the love I have for you, I want us to be cautious. The country is like a bomb. It may seem calm right now, but we don't know what is cooking.”

Later in the day, at the end of English class, Widecherline asked me, “When are you coming to Haiti?” and, before I could even respond, the two adults on the call jumped in to say that it was not a good idea to come, that they would not be in favor of that.

And then on Tuesday night, Steeve and I talked, and I was surprised to hear him say, “Don’t come right now.” He’s never said that before.

Earlier in the day I had asked a Haitian friend who is not a part of Hait Awake what he thought about my returning to Haiti this week, and this is what he said:

“Of course, it's a movie quote because it's me🤣.

‘You can break something in two seconds. But it can take forever to fix it. A lifetime, generations. That's why we have to be careful on this earth and gentle.’

The relationship I have seen you build in Haiti is so, so precious, Becky. That's why your decision has, to some extent, involve their thoughts and feelings on it; unfortunately, in some seasons, they get the last word on what is done.”

And it’s true. I’ve always said that I would listen to the advice of our local partners and do what they say in a situation like this. Now is my chance to live that out - even though it still doesn’t “feel right” to me.

Therefore, today I will continue to love across the miles via Google Meet and be thankful for the ways we do have to stay in touch, even when we can’t physically embrace.

But that doesn’t mean it’s easy because everything in me feels like I am supposed to be in Haiti today.

Thoughts as we start a new week

Lord, to be rooted in place takes commitment to land, to people, to friends and family, to transients in our community, and to the plight of our neighborhoods.

Being rooted is no easy task, but You demonstrated such rootedness in Your incarnation. Give us courage to take up the hard task of knowing You while standing in place. Amen.

From The Book of Common Prayer

And he’s only 8 years old

I wish you could see his face. He is the cutest little boy. He has the sweetest smile and the brightest eyes. Whenever Steeve is around, this little boy is right by his side, wanting to show him something, wanting to tell him something, just wanting his time and attention.

And he’s a prisoner at CERMICOL.

He is not in the Friday English class, but he wandered in recently, watching from the back, a bit shy.

And I asked him if he wanted to participate, to do a Find A Word puzzle like the big boys were doing. And he timidly nodded yes.

Watching him do that puzzle, I saw that he’s not only a handsome little man, he’s also a very bright one. The Find A Word was in English, but he had no problem finding the words and marking them.

And he wanted me to look - he needed me to look - each time he found another word. He smiled broadly, proud of his effort. I let him know I was proud of him, too.

How does an 8-year-old child end up in prison? How does one who has never lived a life of extreme poverty even begin to comprehend all of the moments that together brought him to this place?

And how do we explain that perhaps being a prisoner is possibly a better life than this child would find on the streets?

We at Haiti Awake know him by name, and so does Jesus, even if we’re not free to share his name with the rest of the world.