Life's final common denominator

One of the gifts cancer has given me is the gift of recognizing my own mortality. None of us knows when our day will come, but when you are faced with an incurable diagnosis, you tend to view life a little differently.

Martin Luther King, Jr. woke up on April 4, 1968, not knowing that it would be the last morning of his life. Yet his writing and his speeches leading up to that fateful day showed that he did, in fact, understand that his life could be cut short at any moment.

Two months to the day before his death, Dr. King gave a sermon called “The Drum Major Instinct.” I listened to this sermon as I walked the beach on this morning, the 58th anniversary of his death.

“Every now and then I guess we all think realistically about that day when we will be victimized with what is life's final common denominator—that something that we call death. We all think about it. And every now and then I think about my own death and I think about my own funeral. And I don't think of it in a morbid sense. And every now and then I ask myself, "What is it that I would want said?" And I leave the word to you this morning.

“If any of you are around when I have to meet my day, I don’t want a long funeral. And if you get somebody to deliver the eulogy, tell them not to talk too long. And every now and then I wonder what I want them to say.

“I'd like somebody to mention that day that Martin Luther King, Jr., tried to give his life serving others.
I'd like for somebody to say that day that Martin Luther King, Jr., tried to love somebody. I want you to say that day that I tried to be right on the war question.
I want you to be able to say that day that I did try to feed the hungry.
And I want you to be able to say that day that I did try in my life to clothe those who were naked.
I want you to say on that day that I did try in my life to visit those who were in prison.
I want you to say that I tried to love and serve humanity.

“If I can help somebody as I pass along,
If I can cheer somebody with a word or song,
If I can show somebody he's traveling wrong,
Then my living will not be in vain.

If I can do my duty as a Christian ought,
If I can bring salvation to a world once wrought,
If I can spread the message as the master taught,
Then my living will not be in vain.”

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Running post-Letrozole + Lupron

Since starting Letrozole in 2023, I had noticed a marked decline in my stamina. Of course, I had had surgery just a few weeks before that, so it was never certain whether Letrozole was affecting my physical fitness or if it was a side effect of surgery. My chief complaint while on Letrozole was an excessively elevated heart rate when running. After I started Lupron in the fall of 2025, I found it even more difficult to run, tiring easily.

I bought a new pair of running shoes in January. I questioned whether or not I would ever wear them out. It’s estimated that you can put 300 - 500 miles on a good pair of running shoes before it’s time to rotate them out. With the way I felt in January and knowing I was facing chemotherapy, that seemed like a lot of distance to cover.

However, now that we are at the end of March, I just noticed that I have crossed the 300-mile mark with exercise already this year, and I feel better than I have felt in a very long time while I am running. I can even run without my heart rate spiking too much.

Suffice it to say that I believe Letrozole and Lupron had a negative affect on my physical fitness, and despite the fact that I am one round into chemotherapy, I am feeling better overall than I have felt in a very long time.

For that, I am grateful.

I told someone yesterday that I have spent my life training for what I thought would be the ability to grow old gracefully. Instead, now I believe I’ve been in training to be able to endure chemotherapy and whatever comes after that.

Round 2 of chemotherapy is April 6. I plan to continue to enjoy this period of feeling phenomenal before going into another hard week.

“And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.”

— Hebrews 12:1-2

It's a new week

Thank you for all the prayers and support last week. My next infusion date is April 6.

I am feeling like myself again and planning to enjoy this down time before Round 2.

Today was my 2nd post-chemo shampoo. So far, so good.

Chemo. Round 1. Day 7.

I woke up feeling like myself this morning. I went for a run. Then I walked down the beach. I went to church. I believe the worst of it for round 1 is behind me.

The only odd thing today was food aversion (my usual yogurt and banana) and food craving (eggs with jalapenos).

My next infusion is scheduled for April 6.

Chemo. Round 1. Day 6.

Highs

• Running at the beach this morning

• A sweet “chemo care kit” from Wallaby Windows of Coastal Carolina which just did our window installation in the living room

• Having the coconut kefir that I “like” (Does anyone actually like kefir?)

• Ginger candies from Rachel and lunch with her at Drift

Lows

Persistent low-grade nausea (and yes, I could take Zofran or another one of the three anti-nausea meds that were prescribed, but I would prefer to avoid them as they have their own side effects)

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Chemo. Round 1. Day 5.

Highs

• First Day of Spring

• A walk on the beach

• Time with Clara

Lows

• Bone pain

• Tummy issues

I woke up feeling almost normal today. I opted out of post-chemo steroids as I'm trying to minimize the use of pharmaceuticals as much as I can. I took anti-nausea meds Tuesday and Wednesday night because my oncologist insisted on it, but I didn't like the side effects of the Tuesday night dosage and opted for half that on Wednesday. Half dose wasn’t great, either, so even though I was supposed to take it last night, I decided not to. However, nausea has been minimal today. I find I get nauseous when I'm hungry, so snacks are my friend. 😂

I am experiencing some bone pain, so I got another B12 injection this morning, hoping that will mitigate it to some degree.

This week hasn't been bad, but I recognize there will be a cumulative effect so not expecting each time to be this smooth.

Thank you for caring and for praying. We'll see what the Lord has in store in the days ahead.

Chemo. Round 1. Day 4.

Today’s highs

• Food tasted amazing today. My taste buds were on high-alert!

• A walk at the beach

• Having my hair washed for the first time in nearly a week. (There are very specific rules around washing one’s hair when cold capping.)

Today’s lows. Thankfully both of these had subsided by afternoon.

• Nausea

• Bone pain

I’m hopeful that I will wake up tomorrow feeling more like myself, having the energy to get out and do something.

Chemo. Round 1. Day 3.

I woke up feeling really “off.” I think it's the Olanzapine I took for the first time last night.

I did get to the beach this morning, and I also did some shopping at Pine Valley Market, but most of today has been spent resting.

A dear friend brought me dinner, and I was able to eat (and taste!) it, and for that I am thankful.

An added bonus on the day - Clara came to visit!

I’m hopeful that today was the worst day for this round, and tomorrow I will be feeling more like myself.