Recovery is a process
No matter what the hurricane brings, I want to make saltwater taffy.
The last two days have a bit discouraging as I have seemingly hit a plateau with recovery.
Though I had been warned by Dr. Rossi that people feel “icky” after a liver resection, I was convinced that wouldn’t be the case for me, but it has been, and food aversions combined with intense hunger the last few days have made for less-than-fun moments. Fatigue is a new friend, as well.
This morning, as I sat down to read and journal, I had the conscious thought, “I am going to have to fight in order not to be discouraged. I’m so close to giving in to discouragement.”
I read a number of things each morning, but Catching Whimsy by Bob Goff is generally the place where I find the most practical, “hits me where I am” reading. Today I was reminded, once again, that we have an on-time God and He gives us what we need before we even ask.
So, if you ever hear me say I’m making saltwater taffy, you’ll know what I mean.
Little by little
It’s hard to believe surgery was last Wednesday. Since my Sunday evening update, I’ve been able to spend time with family and friends, walked the beach, received sweet surprises, and even found a little time to rest!
Recovery has been more difficult than I anticipated with food aversions and cognitive confusion topping the list of complaints, but I am thankful for family who has helped me get foods that “sound good” at any given time and given me rides to the beach in the morning.
I had really hoped to start driving again, but I recognize my brain is not quite there yet. I was able to start reading a novel yesterday (something that until that point was impossible), so I feel like I am moving in the right direction.
Thank you to everyone who has shown your kindness to me in different ways this last week.
And, yes! We’re still waiting on Baby Clara. Her due date is today!
Sunday evening update
The blessings of this weekend will not soon be forgotten.
The weekend went by quickly thanks to friends and family coming by to visit.
Today included a sunrise trip to the beach, finding a shark’s tooth, a bagel sandwich from Beach Bagels, worship at The Bridge, and the sweetest call with some of my loves in Haiti.
The blessings of this weekend won't soon be forgotten. ❤️
Saturday morning update
It was so good to greet the sun this morning.
Yesterday was full of family and friends, and this morning Rick offered to take me down to the beach to see the sunrise. I felt well enough to walk for a few minutes, as well, and that was wonderful.
Baby Clara isn’t here yet!
I am not having to take as much pain medication, and I feel like my energy is coming back. I have to remind myself I went through a fairly substantial procedure just three days ago, and I should rest and not do too much just yet.
“The faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.”
The 12/10/2025 surgery
I remember how You told me
That life may not be easy
And everything that I need
You've already given me.
It’s late afternoon here on December 11, and I'm still struggling a bit with the effects of anesthesia and oxycodone, but so many have reached out that I wanted to share what I can.
The surgery started about 9:30 and ended about 1:45 yesterday. Dr. Zani went first (working for roughly 2 hours) and then Dr. Rossi finished up (again, working for roughly 2 hours). Rick and Ethan met with both surgeons.
Dr. Zani was happy to share that most of the disease was in proximity to the liver rather than attached to it or in it. However, above the liver there was disease attached to the diaphragm. In removing that disease the diaphragm was perforated, and they had to repair the diaphragm. Further, on the back side of the liver, there had been three spots on the PET scan and they removed what appeared to be the disease that matched the scan.
Rick's impression was that Dr. Zani was generally positive about the fact that much of the disease was not in or attached to the liver.
According to Dr. Rossi, disease was widespread throughout the abdomen. She removed all visible disease, but she emphasized that she could only work on what she could see, and there is certainly widespread microscopic disease throughout the abdomen, as well.
There was disease on the appendix, and she removed my appendix.
There was disease on the colon and lower digestive tract, but she was able to remove this without damage to or removal of any of the colon. The colon and the bladder were pressurized to make sure there was no damage there.
Further treatment options will be discussed at my post-op appointment on December 29.
Though we had been hopeful I would be able to come home yesterday, due to the amount of blood that I lost during surgery as well as a few minor complications such as a low body temperature (88 degrees), it was best for me to spend the night at Duke. I had a great nurse named Lionel, and I actually slept quite a bit.
I was discharged about 10 am today, and it was a smooth trip back to Wilmington. I was greeted by some peonies my sweet (and 39 weeks pregnant) daughter-in-law had left for me.
Big decisions lie ahead, but for now, I'm just thankful to be home.
Today these lyrics have been playing in my head:
I remember how You told me
That life may not be easy
And everything that I need
You've already given me
You've walked me through fires
Pulled me from flames
If You're in this with me
I won't be afraid.
When the smoke billows higher, oh and higher
And it feels like I can barely breathe
I'll walk through these fires
'Cause You're walking with me.
-Jordan St. Cyr
Thank you to the many who have prayed and shown your love in tangible ways. I am humbled by your thoughtfulness and kindness.
How it started...
Pre-op
How it's going
Post-op
All didn't go exactly as planned, (for one, I'm down an appendix🤣).
I'm here at Duke for the night. More details in the days ahead.
Thanks for praying ❤️
One last delivery
The time has come. Rick and I will head to Durham in about an hour, and I have packed as much as I could into today. I am happy to report I was able to go for a run, then a walk on the beach early this morning. Beyond that, all Christmas presents are wrapped and under the tree, and laundry is washed and put away. I made one last bank transaction for Haiti Awake, and I even had a chance to do one more delivery for Moe’s. (No matter how well surgery goes tomorrow, I won’t be able to lift much until sometime in January. Therefore, I’ll be out for a while.)
This is what was waiting for me at work when I arrived. It was so unexpected. My heart was touched. Nearly six years ago when we stopped at Moe’s one night for dinner and the GM asked, “Hey! Are you interested in a little part-time job?” I’m so glad I said, “Yes!” I enjoy getting out in the community, meeting people, and bringing them food. (Who doesn’t love Moe’s?)
If you had asked me what I needed today, I would never have guessed this was it. But it was.
Surgery is a week from today
We have to prepare ourselves for our death with the same care and attention as our parents prepared themselves for our birth. Henri Nouwen
As we walk through this Advent season, a season of hopeful waiting in the darkness, I'm reminded of the gifts cancer has given me - not the least of which has been the gift of purposeful reflection.
Today's devotional from Henri Nouwen is especially applicable to where my heart is right now.
